Even a Lonely Squirrel Has Its Burrow - Chapter 112

“Baby, if you don’t tell me why you’re acting like this, I won’t know anything….”

When he spoke in a gentle tone, Garam glanced at Sa Muheon with sulky eyes before quickly turning his head away. However, judging by the way even the rims of his ears were flushed red, it didn’t seem like he disliked what was said.

Garam kept his lips tightly sealed for a long while. But when he saw no sign that Sa Muheon would let go of his hand, he finally opened his mouth slowly.

“It’s just… because I’m a little embarrassed.”

“What’s so embarrassing about it?”

Garam didn’t answer for another long moment before he hesitantly spoke again.

“Saying what kind of relationship we have….”

“Oh, that’s what you were embarrassed about?”

Upon realizing what Garam was thinking, Sa Muheon finally let out a relaxed laugh. Garam lowered his head in embarrassment at that laughter, but Sa Muheon was in a great mood.

Just as he had told his mother, the two of them hadn’t yet clearly defined their relationship. But Sa Muheon didn’t think it was a big problem, even if their relationship had no clear name. After all, it was undeniable that Garam was interested in him, and he was confident that his own feelings wouldn’t change.

Still, he couldn’t help the bouts of anxiety that occasionally crept up. He was someone who was usually bold and shameless, but in the end, he couldn’t help but be weak in front of the person he liked.

But hearing what Garam just said, at the very least, made it clear to Sa Muheon that Garam was very much interested in him and that the day when they could have each other all to themselves wasn’t far off.

Sa Muheon smiled lazily, like a contented beast, and tightened his grip on Garam’s hand. Even as Garam fidgeted in his grasp, he didn’t try to pull away. That alone was enough to make Sa Muheon feel satisfied.

“You’re still such a little kid. When will you ever grow up?”

“…I am grown up. It’s not like I’m some little child.”

Hearing Garam grumble in a sulky voice made Sa Muheon chuckle. Every time the topic of age was brought up, Garam would always get defensive, yet he would never realize that doing so only made him seem even more like a child. Sa Muheon giggled and spoke.

“Didn’t you hear what my mother said earlier? No matter how old I get, I’ll always be a kid in her eyes. It’s the same for me. No matter how old you get, you’ll always look like a little kid to me.”

“…….”

Garam pursed his lips and said nothing. But the faint curve of his lips hinted at his true feelings. He was so honest, truly. Sa Muheon swallowed the laughter that threatened to spill out.

“Come to think of it, what about school today?”

“I have no classes today.”

“Really? That’s a relief.”

Sa Muheon didn’t want to disrupt Garam’s studies because of him. He genuinely thought it was a relief, but Garam’s expression darkened as if he had something on his mind.

“What’s so relieving about this when you’re hurt like this?”

Garam spoke in a gloomy voice, his sullen face fixed on Sa Muheon’s shoulder, hidden beneath the hospital gown.

Sa Muheon thought he was lucky to have survived with just these injuries. But at least he had enough sense not to say that in front of Garam. He quietly waited for Garam to continue.

“…But still, I’m really glad you woke up safely. I really am.”

“Yeah. It’s a relief.”

“I was afraid… you wouldn’t wake up….”

There was a hint of tears in Garam’s voice. He quickly bit his lip to stop himself from speaking further, but he couldn’t stop the tears from falling.

Noticing the drops rolling down his cheeks, Garam hurriedly raised his hand to wipe them away.

“Ah, I wasn’t going to cry….”

Watching him awkwardly laugh while rubbing his eyes, Sa Muheon felt a dull ache in his heart.

Just moments ago, he had thought it was lucky he had survived with only these injuries. But seeing Garam silently shedding tears, he realized how careless that thought had been.

Thinking about how much Garam must have agonized over these very wounds he had so easily brushed off made him feel utterly pathetic for saying it was a relief.

On top of that, he felt even more useless for being unable to hold Garam or comfort him properly as he cried.

There wasn’t much he could do in this situation. Normally, he would have wrapped his arms around Garam and gently patted his back until he stopped crying.

Garam wasn’t the type to cry often, so he had rarely shed tears in front of Sa Muheon. But on the few occasions he had, he would always calm down while receiving Sa Muheon’s touch.

But right now, he couldn’t do that.

Even in the brief moment Sa Muheon was lost in thought, Garam’s tears continued to fall. The way they rolled down his cheeks in shimmering droplets was heartbreaking.

In the end, there was only one thing he could do in this situation.

“…I’m sorry.”

“…….”

Garam sniffled and lifted his head to look at Sa Muheon.

“I’m really sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

Sa Muheon paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. It felt like his mind was swirling with countless words and sentences. He worried whether he would be able to properly convey what he was feeling to Garam.

He hesitated to speak, fearing that his careless words might hurt Garam even more.

“I….”

Even though he barely managed to open his mouth, the words wouldn’t come easily.

Garam had stopped crying at some point and was looking at Sa Muheon. His eyes, still damp with lingering tears, were focused entirely on him, making it even harder to speak.

But he couldn’t avoid this moment.

Sa Muheon instinctively realized that this was a crucial turning point.

“…To be honest, I thought I was just lucky. When I saw that bastard return to his original form, I thought there was no way I’d survive.”

“…….”

It had been difficult to start speaking, but once the words began flowing, he found himself able to continue more calmly than expected.

He carefully retraced his memories.

Garam’s eyes widened in shock, but he said nothing, simply waiting for Sa Muheon to continue.

“I thought I wasn’t prepared enough. I had tried to handle things too hastily, and in the end, my poor judgment was going to get me killed.

So, honestly, when I woke up today….”

“…….”

“I just thought I was lucky. Even though I can’t properly use one of my arms for a while, at least I’m still alive.”

Sa Muheon took a deep breath.

Even that simple act made his injured shoulder throb with pain.

Yeah, surviving with just these injuries really was lucky.

To be honest, he still didn’t think he was entirely wrong to believe that.

But he had to admit—saying those words out loud had been a mistake.

“But I was completely wrong.”

“…What?”

At his words, Garam showed a bewildered expression.

“If I had known you would be this sad, I would have done anything to come back without a single injury.”

“Ah…”

Garam parted his lips as if he wanted to say something. However, he soon closed his mouth without uttering a word. But Sa Muheon was curious about what Garam had been about to say. Staring intently at Garam, who was pressing his lips together, Sa Muheon waited. Garam let out a small sigh before quietly opening his mouth.

“…At first, Team Leader Jang called me.”

As if recalling that moment, Garam spoke more slowly than usual. His eyebrows furrowed slightly, as though simply recalling the memory was painful. A kind of suffering that Sa Muheon had never seen before appeared on his face. Not even when Garam had been threatened directly by Ryu Bŏmju had he made such a pained expression. Yet now, just thinking about the situation in which Sa Muheon had been injured seemed to torment him unbearably. That, in turn, delivered another kind of pain to Sa Muheon.

“Before I picked up the call, I never imagined… I just thought, maybe your work finished earlier than expected today, so you were coming home early? I think I was having those kinds of carefree thoughts.”

“…….”

“But… I’ve never seen Team Leader Jang look so shocked before. He’s always so calm. But in an instant, his face went completely pale…”

Garam was still frowning. However, when his eyes met Sa Muheon’s, he forced the corners of his lips upward, as if trying to reassure him with a smile. But his furrowed brows remained, creating an odd expression. It didn’t seem amusing at all. Rather, he looked so hurt that Sa Muheon found himself unable to say anything.

“He said we had to go to the hospital immediately… but over the phone, all I heard was that you were going into surgery. Until I arrived, I had no way of knowing exactly what had happened. The whole way to the hospital, countless thoughts ran through my mind.”

The bitter smile on his lips did not fade. Garam continued speaking quietly.

“And then, all of a sudden, it started to rain… It made me think of bad things.”

“…….”

“It rained heavily the day my grandmother passed away. I also remembered visiting her columbarium recently… So, I just…”

Garam’s voice began to waver with moisture. Sa Muheon could only watch helplessly as his tears welled up. But Garam quickly wiped his tears away, forcing a bright smile onto his face.

“Still, like you said… I also think it’s a relief that you’re alive.”

“That’s…”

Sa Muheon wanted to refute those words, but Garam shook his head first.

“No, I really mean it.”

“…….”

“Every time I’ve received a call like that and rushed to the hospital… it always meant saying goodbye to someone. But this time, it wasn’t. So…”

Garam took a deep breath. Then, he gave a radiant smile. Though sorrow still lingered in that expression, the words that followed carried his sincere feelings.

“So… it’s really a relief. Because you came back to me like this.”