Even a Lonely Squirrel Has Its Burrow - Chapter 77

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“So, if you look at this part….”

Even though the lecture continued, Garam’s gaze wandered into empty space. Though he appeared to be looking ahead, none of the content the professor wrote on the board entered his mind. No matter how many times he tried to focus, his thoughts refused to align with his will.

The conversation he had with Jang Seokgyu before entering the lecture hall kept occupying his mind. And those thoughts led to yet another set of worries.

Through his conversation with Seokgyu, Garam began to question whether he was simply relying on Sa Muheon or if he truly harbored a different kind of affection for him. The thought left Garam feeling increasingly confused.

Yet, as Seokgyu pointed out, Sa Muheon’s behavior seemed to far exceed the boundaries of a typical protector. If that was the case, did it mean, as Seokgyu suggested, that Sa Muheon also felt that kind of affection toward him?

Of course, Garam couldn’t know Sa Muheon’s true feelings. Unless he heard it directly from him, his current worries were ultimately meaningless.

But even knowing that, his thoughts spiraled endlessly. Finally, with a sigh, Garam decided to sneak out during the break.

While he had seen other classmates leave in the middle of lectures, this was Garam’s first time disappearing during class. Since the professor had also stepped out momentarily, he just needed to quietly pack his bag and leave. Yet, feeling overly self-conscious, Garam couldn’t even lift his head properly as he exited the lecture hall.

“Haa….”

Garam let out a deep sigh. A sense of self-reproach swept over him.

Still, he comforted himself with the thought that staying in the lecture hall wouldn’t help him concentrate on the lecture anyway. Garam took out his phone. After a moment of hesitation, he made a call.

Fortunately, the other person answered shortly after.

“…Sorry for calling out of the blue. Do you have some time?”

“Hyung!”

From a distance, Minjae waved at Garam. Garam gave a weak smile and raised his hand in response. Following behind Garam, Jang Seokgyu left a comment about waiting nearby and then stepped away to give them space.

As Garam approached, Minjae leaned in close to whisper.

“Is that guy with you every day?”

“Yeah.”

When Garam nodded, Minjae let out a soft exclamation and glanced curiously in the direction where Jang Seokgyu had disappeared. However, Jang Seokgyu didn’t reappear. Smiling faintly, Garam pulled Minjae inside.

Minjae, not particularly insistent on seeing Jang Seokgyu, willingly followed Garam’s lead.

Ding-dong-.

Although there was a “Break Time” sign hanging on the entrance, Minjae entered naturally. Garam carefully followed behind him. Once inside, Minjae called out loudly for someone.

“Seonho hyung, where are you?”

“Here.”

At Minjae’s call, Seonho poked his head out from a room further in. Garam, upon recognizing his face, bowed his head politely.

“Hello.”

“Welcome.”

Having seen Garam before, Seonho greeted him warmly with a gentle smile.

“Hyung, come on in. Seonho hyung was just saying he’d make something delicious. How did you call at just the right time?”

“I didn’t mean to….”

“Haha! Of course, I’m just saying. Come on in.”

Minjae pulled Garam further inside. As Minjae had mentioned, the table was laid with an array of dishes. Although Garam hadn’t felt like eating earlier, the sight of the appetizing food stirred a sense of hunger.

“Sit down.”

Encouraged by Minjae’s insistence, Garam sat down across from him, offering another polite greeting to Seonho, who sat beside Minjae.

“If I’d known we’d have guests, I would’ve prepared a little more.”

“No, this is more than enough. I’m sorry for barging in unannounced.”

“Hyung, what’s there to be sorry for? It’s better to eat together!”

Minjae firmly shook his head at Garam’s apology. While it might have been true for Minjae, Garam still felt uncomfortable about interrupting their time together. He also couldn’t predict how Minjae’s partner might feel about the sudden intrusion.

“In any case. It seems like you have something to say, but let’s eat first.”

“Ah, yeah….”

Garam was momentarily startled by Minjae’s words, which seemed to pierce straight through him, and he couldn’t respond immediately. Hesitatingly, he picked up his spoon, and Minjae also began eating in earnest.

The food was absolutely delicious. Truly, it was the first time Garam had ever tasted something so good. Throughout the meal, he couldn’t hide his admiration.

Minjae’s partner, Seonhu, kept tending to Minjae while also smiling in delight at Garam’s reactions. Although Garam felt a bit embarrassed whenever their eyes met, he still thought it was only polite to repeatedly express his appreciation for the delicious meal they had prepared.

After the meal, they were served coffee. An iced latte was placed in front of Minjae, and a warm latte was set before Garam. Looking at the beautifully crafted latte art, Garam realized that, for a brief moment, he had forgotten about his worries.

As he wrapped his hands around the cup, a gentle warmth spread to his palms. The complicated emotions in his heart seemed to settle a little.

Watching Garam fiddling with his cup, Minjae couldn’t hold back any longer and was the first to speak.

“So, what’s been bothering you so much that you reached out to me first?”

“Well…”

Startled by the blunt question, Garam momentarily lost his words and could only open and close his mouth. Sitting beside Minjae, Seonhu placed a hand on Minjae’s arm. Only then did Minjae flinch slightly and glance between Garam and Seonhu, gauging their reactions.

“…It’s just… you don’t usually talk about this kind of stuff, Garam-hyung. I’m just curious, you know? So I can either help or something…”

Muttering excuses, Minjae eventually clamped his mouth shut. He waited patiently for Garam to speak. Garam, feeling grateful, exchanged glances of acknowledgment with both Seonhu and Minjae. His worries persisted for a while longer before he managed to sort through his thoughts and begin speaking slowly.

“Well… after talking to you, Minjae, I gave it some more thought.”

“With me? Oh, about that?”

Minjae, looking puzzled, quickly seemed to find the answer on his own and nodded.

“…I think I might have feelings for that person.”

“If you like someone, you like them. What’s with the ‘I might have feelings’ part?”

Minjae, genuinely baffled, widened his eyes as he asked. Then, as though he felt a kick under the table, he let out a small yelp and glared downward. It seemed Seonhu had subtly signaled him. Normally, Garam might have let out a small laugh, but right now, he couldn’t muster even a smile.

Waiting for Minjae’s gaze to meet his again, Garam responded to the question Minjae had just posed.

“I’m not certain about my feelings.”

Minjae blinked, silently urging Garam to continue.

“Right now, that person is supporting me. I rely on them a lot—not just emotionally, but financially as well. They’ve been giving me tremendous support.”

It felt a little embarrassing to share such things for the first time, but at the same time, it was liberating to release the thoughts he had kept bottled up. Once the dam was breached, it became surprisingly easy to let it all flow out.

“To be honest… without them, I’d probably be in a dangerous situation. Actually, I know I would be. I was so scared before because I couldn’t see any way to solve things on my own.”

Garam let out a faint, helpless laugh. His hands still hadn’t left the cup he was holding.

When the debt collectors came to his house, when he realized the staggering amount he could never repay in a lifetime, when he found out it was all Ryu Beomju’s doing yet had no way of locating him—those moments of utter despair and fear still sent chills through him whenever he remembered them. The warm cup in his hands was the only thing keeping those feelings at bay. Garam slowly absorbed the heat radiating from the cup.

“And that’s… my dilemma.”

“……”

“I’m relying on them so much that maybe… maybe I’m just confusing my desperation for something special—like thinking I love them.”

Though Garam’s words were framed as a question, he wasn’t really seeking an answer from the others. Deep down, he knew. Defining his feelings was something only he could do. While he could seek advice, the final decision was his alone.

It was true that Minjae’s words had triggered this bout of introspection, but Garam had also been vaguely aware of it himself.

The possibility that he might develop some special feelings for Samooheon had both excited and terrified him. It brought moments of joy and hope but also a great deal of anxiety and concern.

When Garam finally finished speaking, the two people sitting across from him remained silent. Bitterly, he smiled and continued fiddling with the cup, which was gradually losing its warmth. Just as he was starting to regret bringing up such a difficult topic and putting them in an awkward position, one of them finally spoke up cautiously.