It's a Gender-Reversed World, But I Don't Go Out Anyway - Chapter 16
Chapter 16: A Streamer Starved for Praise
* * *
“Man, this is unwinnable.”
Watching all their skills focusing fire on me, I sensed my impending death. There seemed to be no way out of this. Then, like a ray of light, something dropped near me.
[Oh?]
[Is Thresh using that?]
The lantern. Our team’s Thresh’s skill – click it and you fly to Thresh’s side gripping the lantern. But my HP was already tattered from various attacks, and Rij’in’s sonic wave was already attached to my body. Even if I escaped using the lantern, Rij’in would fly right after me. Maybe Thresh would be put in danger too. Still, clinging to that thread of hope, I clicked the lantern.
“Argh!”
Sure enough, Rij’in flew in.
My HP was already so low that even a whisper would kill me. That’s when Thresh threw his Q into empty air. That space where no one was yet –
He threw Q into the empty space where Rij’in was flying toward, and it hit.
“What the! Who are you!”
[LOL hahaha]
[This is no longer Geogeun-daejubang’s[1] stream but Geoyou-kimjihye’s[2] stream.]
[How many moves ahead did you see…]
[This is… Gold rank?]
I shouted in excitement. The viewers’ reactions were hot too.
But that wasn’t all – since Thresh was positioned near the turret, he smoothly used his E skill to push Rij’in toward the turret, and I just clicked in panic to land one basic attack and-
[FIRST BLOOD!]
“Huh? …Ah cut!”
[He’s weirdly good at last-hitting]
[But honestly at this point I would’ve just given the kill to Thresh lololol]
I somehow managed to get first blood in a daze.
[She’s pretty good, average for daejubang]
[Yeah, you need to be at least this good to be part of Big Package Squad lol]
[Small-chested girls are always good at games lololol]
[So that’s why I’m Iron rank I guess]
[Small chest and no conscience too]
Thresh sent a smiling bee emote and recalled back to base with me. Despite falling behind a bit in CS due to this unexpected advantage, our item situation was much more favorable than the enemy’s.
“Thresh-nim, our synergy was great.”
[Synergy?]
[It was just Thresh being good…]
[As if he wouldn’t try to take credit, trying to take credit even for that situation]
After that, Thresh continued to show impressive plays during the laning phase.
Landing hooks predicting Ez’s Arcane Shift, using E to pull back when Yumi tried to attach again. After getting his ultimate, he made bold Flash initiations. Amidst these continuous plays, what burned hottest was the chat –
To be precise, not my stream chat but the in-game chat:
[Rij’in]: thresh must be a smurf ffs
[Ez]: ugh lol kaisa sucks but we’re gonna lose cuz of support gap gg
[Yumi]: Fact) Ez’s nickname is the blonde orphan and our team’s Ez is indeed an orphan.
“These bastards always fight in all chat. And I wasn’t playing that badly”
[Well… I guess…?]
[You weren’t bad, but Thresh is really good.]
[Daeju played well too. Thresh is just too good]
From this point, something started feeling uncomfortable in a corner of my heart.
Even when I stole Dragon later-
[Did you see how she used hook on the jungler so they couldn’t smite?]
[Insane, just insane]
[Carry ;;]
And then when I got a quadra kill-
[Well raised, Thresh!]
[Even then she zoned Rij’in perfectly lol]
[Daeju, you’re lucky to get such a support bus!]
The game ultimately ended with a 20-minute surrender, but something still felt uncomfortable in my heart.
“Ah well… we won…”
[Why does your voice sound so down?]
“No, I’m really happy we won but…”
How should I put it. I think I dealt good damage and performed pretty well for playing this champion for the first time. But something felt frustrating in my heart. No, to be frank, with both the chat and other in-game players all praising Thresh-
“Didn’t I play well too…?”
[Well you weren’t bad~]
[Well… not bad but there was someone who played a bit better so haha]
[You’re not the type to get jealous and envious of viewers, right?]
I unconsciously complained a bit, but everyone started needling me saying I was getting upset.
“Now praise me”
I opened a viewer’s profile and hovered my mouse over the ban button.
[Here’s the praise extortionist lolol]
[Praise if you don’t wanna die]
[Neomkkollryeodaeju: Wait that’s me?]
[Look at that nickname lolol]
The viewer now on trial understood my intention despite being flustered.
[Neomkkollryeodaeju: So I get banned if I don’t praise???]
[Lol Seems like it]
[Hey just take the ban and pay bail to come back, why sell your pride?]
“Don’t look at other viewer reactions and just be honest!”
While Thresh did play well, I clearly had my moments too after that. Dragon steal, quadra kill. Anyone could see these were flawless plays. I just played well. Or did great for my first time. I would’ve been satisfied with just this level of praise, not excessive compliments.
[Yeah be honest!]
[Fight against oppression!]
Strangely, both sides were saying to be honest when the person in question spoke up.
[Neomkkollryeodaeju: You… you played w-well…]
“See, I played well right?”
[Huh?]
[Well? Well?]
Honestly, bot lane isn’t a solo lane and no matter how well Thresh plays, it’s meaningless if the ADC can’t follow up, and I think I followed up well. How else could I get a quadra kill if I played badly?
[Neomkkollryeodaeju: You p-played… w-well… Thresh played well so why are you taking the praise you parasite!]
ㄴ[Has been forcibly removed.]
[That felt good~]
[Our Big Package Squad says what needs to be said]
Right after that sharp turn, I mercilessly hit the ban.
She immediately donated 10,000 won.
[Neomkkollryeodaeju has donated 10,000 won]
– Please let me out~
I had to unban her. It was 10,000 won after all.
By the way, I was starting to not understand what this “Daeju-Dan”(Big Package Squad) thing was.
“What do you mean Daeju-Dan when you won’t even praise me once!”
[Big Package Squad who loves Daeju more than anyone but always insults him]
[If you always insult someone doesn’t that mean you don’t like them?]
[You think so?]
These people claiming to be my fans were “eokppa[3]” – they wouldn’t give forced praise, but this situation where they always subtly criticized me felt unsatisfying.
“This eokkka[3] culture needs to change, you know? Like, eokppa is fine but eokkka culture is not okay!”
[But don’t they all do eokppa in other streams, and only act like this in Daeju’s stream?]
[Yeah when I go to other male streamer rooms they get praised even if they’re terrible at games.]
[Not just male streamers, even if they’re duuhan like the streamer the chat is clean lol]
[For real the chat acts all fake nice lol]
Surprisingly, these toxic viewers apparently put on masks and pretend to be nice in other streams.
My complaint is why they only act this way toward me
“Then why do you only do this to me”
[Other streams have handsome men, but you’re a delicious man lmao]
[That’s true lol]
[You know GSGG[4]? Like streamer, like viewer.]
[You’re the one who created monsters like us]
“If I start streaming nicely from now on, will you all be nice too?”
I asked just in case, though I didn’t think it was possible.
[That premise doesn’t make sense, how could you stream nicely?]
[For real lol]
[But bullying nice people is kind of hot too]
[Agreed]
Looking at the chat, it seemed impossible.
After that, I played about 2 more games with Thresh, and since viewers noticed I was hungry for praise, they started mixing in some praise. The problem was that their “praise” was more like backhanded compliments like [He may be bad at games but he’s a nice person].
“Good work everyone.”
After finishing duo with the viewer named KimJihye, I ranked up two tiers thanks to the win streak.
I wasn’t particularly happy. Maybe because it wasn’t a win purely from my own strength like before. Or maybe-
“Too much power is… boring…”
[ndss][5]
[Ugh that’s so cringe]
[I shouldn’t say this but please hold your breath for 17 minutes]
[Why 17 minutes?]
[So you die]
Before ending the stream, I suddenly thought to check my Tgether board.
There was no particular reason, it was just too early to end stream but I didn’t feel like playing more League. Just to kill time. It seemed like quite a few more users were visiting here now, with posts being more active than before and average upvotes being higher.
Among them, there was one post with the most upvotes.
The title was [I’m the girl who drilled and gave the house number at the mart]
“Ah that person from back then. She was helpful.”
The memory from that time came flooding back.
She was a kind viewer who helped me struggle through the mart situation which was too difficult for my extremely lacking social skills. I wanted to say thanks but she left right after helping as if nothing happened, who knew I’d see her post here.
***
[I’m the girl who drilled and gave the house number at the mart]
Back then I noticed it was the mart near his house and knew where they sold drills and house numbers so I thought I’d just bring it to Daeju and do some IRL donae.[6]
After giving it I was trying to say something but I’m socially inept too so I just gave it and ran away lol
Taking questions.
[Comments]
– So you were that 8-foot ghost?
ㄴ You fu*king b*tch
– How’s Daeju in real life?
ㄴ I’d do him
ㄴ Oh
– Why didn’t you jump him?
ㄴ Regretting it now, next time we meet…
ㄴ You crazy b*tch Lmao
ㄴ Daeju checks these posts you know… Goodbye.
I gained another reason why I shouldn’t go outside.
Plus, any grateful feelings I had completely vanished. How do all my viewers end up becoming toxic like this? Or maybe only toxic people like my streams?
After briefly exploring Tgether and as stream end time approached, I casually mentioned:
“About to end stream and- ah… no stream tomorrow.”
[So we’re nothing to you now that you’re getting AC installed?]
[Are we just your cash cows?]
[Nah guys lol he’s lowering our expectations to surprise us with a stream]
[That must be it lmao]
Of course the reaction wasn’t good.
Here I tried using the hospital excuse which was ranked in the top 5 Best Excuse Rankings.
“No, I have… a hospital-”
[You’ll be at the hospital all day?]
[Legendary excuse]
[Don’t know what hurts but seems like your head hurts. Taking a break from streaming?]
[Streaming over health.]
No chance.
So I decided to push through.
“I just want to rest. I used to be a NEET who gamed without saying a word, streaming is hard”
[Can’t argue with that.]
[When you’re that honest there’s nothing to say]
[True;;]
I got my break.
Actually, there was a separate reason why I pushed so hard for this break. While streaming fatigue was part of it, I’d done various part-time jobs before and streaming wasn’t hard enough to complain about. It was just because of one email that arrived.
[Regarding the Partner Streamer position-]
* * *
(End of Chapter)
T/N:
1.”bang” means room/stream.
2. “geoyou” (거유) – Korean word meaning “large breasts”, used as wordplay in a viewer’s name
3. “eokppa” (억빠) and “eokkka” (억까) – Korean internet slang. “eok” means forced, “ppa” is from fan (빠순이), “kka” means criticism. So “forced fan” vs “forced criticism”
4. “GSGG” (그스그청) – Internet slang abbreviation of “그 스트리머에 그 시청자” meaning “like streamer, like viewer”
5. “ndss” (ㄴㄷㅆ) – Korean keyboard initials for “냉동삼겹살” (frozen pork belly), used as slang to express cringe
6. “donae” (도네) – Short for donation