It's a Gender-Reversed World, But I Don't Go Out Anyway - Chapter 44

Chapter 44: Just Order Delivery

***

“Hey, this smell… spicy and… fishy… no, it’s ocean-scented~”

[LOLOLOL ‘ocean-scented’ my ass, it’s fishy AF]

[Could tell from when he used cheap seafood mix]

[Still defending it through gritted teeth]

[Come on~ Let’s just order jjamppong from a Chinese restaurant~]

There was definitely a fishy smell. But it wasn’t so bad that it was inedible… or was it?

I wasn’t sure what went wrong, but the fishiness was more intense than I’d expected. When I first made the broth, I thought it just had a mild anchovy-like fishiness, but after combining it with the vegetables stir-fried in chili oil, it became overwhelming.

Strange. How did mixing it with vegetables seasoned with chili oil and red pepper powder make the smell worse instead of better?

Or was this the result of simmering it for over an hour?

At least the noodles looked appetizing, with that signature curly instant ramen texture that every Korean would recognize. While the broth might be a lost cause, wouldn’t it be fine if at least the noodles tasted good? Yeah, jjamppong is originally a noodle dish anyway.

[Oh, he’s gonna eat it]

[The stench is coming through the screen]

[You know the rules – gotta slurp those noodles loudly]

[I actually find loud noodle-eating sounds super off-putting]

[You two, fight IRL]

“I’ll eat it how I want!”

I bravely picked up some noodles with my chopsticks.

Getting a whiff up close made me involuntarily exclaim “Whoa.” Not in amazement, but more like questioning if this was right.

It looked really good, but…

I courageously slurped up a mouthful of noodles.

The initial taste was honestly hard to define. Oily? Not exactly greasy. Thanks to the chili oil and pepper powder it wasn’t too rich, but it had this overwhelming quality. And the real problem came after I got used to the pepper flavor. Something that had been masked by the chili started creeping up.

“Ah…”

[LOLOLOL did something unfortunate happen?]

[What’s with that sigh?]

[LOL he’s sighing because it’s SO delicious LOL]

[Those chopsticks seem pretty stationary for that to be true haha]

I’d used garlic and pepper to make the broth, but instead of masking the fishiness, some kind of chemical reaction must have occurred to create the bizarre new genre of spicy fishiness. I was impressed at how perfectly this would convey my level of disgust to anyone I disliked enough to serve it to.

An hour of cooking time wasted, ingredients that cost more than just ordering jjamppong, and looking at the kitchen, there was an enormous amount of dishes to wash, plus my mouth felt awful. And judging by how oily it was, this definitely couldn’t be good for my health.

Come to think of it, my stomach was starting to hurt…

[Why so quiet?]

[Did he die?]

[How rude;;; Please say ‘Did this person pass away?’]

[So did he die or not?]

[Nah his chopsticks moved]

“It’s disappointing but… for a first attempt, maybe it passes…”

At least it wasn’t burned.

If I’d just had a better grasp of the ingredients while cooking, wouldn’t it have been somewhat successful? I’d like to believe that.

If not, I probably won’t ever cook again.

I took out my phone.

I mean, this is inedible.

I ordered jjamppong through a delivery app. For the viewers, under the excuse of comparing delivery jjamppong with my own.

“I’ll compare it with restaurant jjamppong”

[That really means he can’t eat his own so he’s ordering delivery]

[LOLOLOL let’s eat some healthy delivered jjamppong]

[People living alone, don’t try to show off – just order delivery]

[Did you surpass Yeonhee’s jjamppong?]

[Visual-wise you won, taste might be neck and neck]

“Hey, at least I didn’t burn it…”

[That makes it worse LOL Not burning it and still ending up like this]

[For real LOL]

[Seriously the worst cook ever]

[It’s okay Daeju, with a little effort you’ll catch up to Yeonhee.]

Feeling a bit dejected, I decided to browse the forum until the jjamppong arrived.

Since getting the webcam, I’d set up the ability to freely switch broadcast views, so I switched to the computer screen.

***

[Photos of dishes cooked so far]

(Photo)

These are all the dishes I’ve cooked so far

Sweet and sour pork, la zi ji[1], mapo tofu, jjamppong – I’ve loved Chinese food since I was young so it’s all Chinese dishes.

Suddenly felt like showing off my cooking

Absolutely not timing this post. If you say I timed it, you’re obviously right LOL Daeju, what are you looking at LOLOLOL

You can’t cook like this LOL

[Comments]

– Did you take these photos specifically for this day? LOLOLOL

– Make me sweet and sour pork.
ㄴ OP: Are you male?
ㄴ I am
ㄴ OP: Pass

– Daeju’s gonna feel so inadequate seeing this LOL The jjamppong photo was brutal.
ㄴ At least they look similar
ㄴ Yeah, you look similar to an idol too LOL You both have two eyes and two ears LOL

***

“How did they know I would look…”

[You’re always checking Tgether anyway LOL]

[FR FR always cares about public opinion while constantly destroying it]

[So if I post my nudes there Daeju will see them ㅜㅑ…]

[Why don’t you think about us?]

“Why don’t YOU think about ME?”

Looking at the photos, I did feel envious.

Can people like this recreate recipes almost exactly when they see them on broadcasts? Honestly, along with feeling envious, I also felt annoyed and quickly moved to another post.

I could sense the intention behind posting such photos, and while I’d thought the visuals were decent, seeing these made me think mine was just mediocre, and wait – they must have used chili oil too, so why isn’t there oil floating on top? What did they do?

Next was a broadcast content idea post, which had become a regular occurrence.

Ever since I did a broadcast asking for ideas, it had become like a culture on Tgether, popping up periodically, but the problem was that people would shamelessly steal ideas from other streamers and YouTubers. The frustrating part was that the ones I actually thought were good were usually someone else’s ideas.

“Among Us?”

It was a game that had emerged a few years ago and gained huge popularity, but is it still popular these days?

It was like a video game version of the mafia game people played during school trips and retreats, and being both easy to play and having an interesting concept, many people enjoyed it, and when I searched YouTube-

“Wow, this is still really popular?”

[Actually kids these days play Among Us more than Minecraft]

[That’s because the Minecraft addicts disappeared]

[Just thinking about kids playing politics makes me angry]

[The two things I hate most are kids and Daeju]

[Why do you hate kids?]

“Why do you hate ME…”

I don’t have eight friends, but maybe we could include viewers.

The viewers would probably like it.

“But if we include you all, wouldn’t you just watch the broadcast while playing?”

[Could just include trustworthy viewers… oh… there aren’t any…]

[Nah just trust people’s conscience and if someone seems to be watching the broadcast while playing, give us 1 minute to roast them LOL]

[FR FR LOL I’m confident I can say a lot in that time LOL]

[I’m writing insults in notepad in advance LOL]

“Wonder if young viewers will start coming to my YouTube now?”

I browsed YouTube, engaging in wishful thinking.

They might be kids, but as long as the view count is good, the viewing demographic doesn’t matter. At least not in my position.

[Young sprouts becoming Daeju’s fans? Their parents would be devastated LOL]

[I’m in middle school and this is so true, saw parents’ hearts break LOL]

[You’re in middle school? What snacks do you buy at stationery stores these days?]

[Candy cigarettes?]

[You look older than me wtf]

[You look old enough to be a middle schooler’s parent]

“Oh, looks like it’s here.”

The bell rang and as requested, the jjamppong was left at the door.

After switching to webcam, I showed both jjamppong bowls side by side

“Ah, they are different”

[They’re KING different[2] LOL]

[The jjamppong on the right looks like whoever made it has no taste buds LOL]

[The noodles got soggy in the meantime so the visuals got nerfed too LOLOLOL]

[Lost fair and square LOL]

“The smell is different… the visuals are different… but at least mine has more seafood, right?”

[That’s probably why it’s so fishy LOL]

[Moderation is key]

[You lost in taste, smell, and visuals, but the cook is more delicious on Daeju’s side so Daeju wins]

[We don’t know about taste yet LOL]

[But we can guess, can’t we?]

I didn’t wait and took a bite.

Because I was hungry.

Even though I was hungry, my jjamppong remained untouched from its initial amount, but anyway, the delivered jjamppong was extremely delicious.

Still, I couldn’t just admit that straight out.

My hour of effort, the cost of ingredients, and various forms of pride stood in the way.

“Hmm… still not sure. Let me take one more bite”

[How could you not be sure]

[Just let him eat LOL]

[He’s eating with such gusto]

[Ah I need to diet]

[Don’t bother, you’re not winning the lottery LOL][3]

And so I stood there and slowly finished the whole bowl.

Without saying a word. Thanks to viewers who entertained themselves even without commentary, the viewership didn’t drop, but only after finishing did I remember I was streaming.

[Get it now?]

[Stop eating and admit it]

[It’s different, right?]

“By a very slim margin… I lost”

***
(End of Chapter)

T/N:

1.”la zi ji” or dry chili chicken

2. “KING different” is translated from a Korean slang where “king” is used as an intensifier

3. The lottery comment about dieting is a Korean internet meme suggesting that dieting is as unlikely to succeed as winning the lottery