Tan Hua - Chapter 77

The evening meal was served, consisting of light Jing Country dishes. The soup was a medicinal broth to nourish blood and energy, and there was also a sweet dessert made with donkey-hide gelatin.

 

Song Liqing’s eyesight was poor, so Pei Xingxu helped him by picking up the dishes and personally feeding him. His gaze never left Song Liqing, and far from showing any impatience, he seemed to enjoy the quiet time they shared while eating.

 

“Steamed black-bone chicken with red dates, blood sausage, kombu with spinach, grilled beef… Liqing, what would you like to eat first? Or would you like a bowl of soup?” Pei Xingxu asked.

 

Song Liqing wrinkled his small face.

 

“These again?” Song Liqing protested, “Is there deer antler in the soup again? It smells awful, take it away.”

 

“Alright, if you don’t like the smell, take it away, take it away.”

 

Pei Xingxu had to signal the servants to remove the medicinal soup.

 

“But you can’t be picky about the rest.” Pei Xingxu coaxed as he placed a piece of black-bone chicken on Song Liqing’s plate, “Eat a drumstick first. It’s good for your health, it’ll give you strength.”

 

Reluctantly, Song Liqing picked up the drumstick and brought it to his mouth. He never liked meat, and Pei Xingxu’s insistence on him eating meat recently only made him more resistant.

 

“What’s the point of being healthy? It’s not like I have to have a baby.”

 

Song Liqing bit forcefully into the chicken, his words muffled.

 

“Haha.” Pei Xingxu laughed, amused by him. “You don’t need to have a baby, but you do need to get married. If you don’t eat properly, what if you faint during the wedding ceremony?”

 

At the mention of marriage, Song Liqing’s expression froze.

 

He remembered that he had long agreed to marry Pei Xingxu, but just the thought of it made him uncomfortable.

 

He didn’t want to get married.

 

“Brother Xingxu.” Song Liqing asked hesitantly, “Can I not get married?”

 

Pei Xingxu’s hand paused mid-air, finally placing a piece of kombu in Song Liqing’s bowl.

 

“Why? Don’t you want to be my queen?”

 

Pei Xingxu smiled as he asked, though the smile was a bit forced.

 

“It’s not that…”

 

Song Liqing had always felt complicated emotions toward Pei Xingxu, and now with his damaged mind, he couldn’t articulate his thoughts clearly.

 

“Being your queen is nice, and you’ve been good to me. It’s just… it’s just…” Song Liqing hesitated, “But I’ve already been married.”

 

As soon as he said this, not only did Pei Xingxu’s expression falter, but even Jun Qiyu, who was standing by the door, raised his head abruptly.

 

He hadn’t dared to speak; Song Liqing was more frightened by his voice than by a ghost’s wail.

 

Seeing Song Liqing, happily sharing dinner with Guan Sheng and Pei Xingxu like a harmonious family of three, Jun Qiyu felt a deep bitterness.

 

But I’ve already been married…

 

These words filled Jun Qiyu with sudden hope.

 

It meant he hadn’t forgotten at all and still considered it an important matter!

 

Jun Qiyu felt as if he had come back to life from the dead.

 

Pei Xingxu said softly, “What does it matter if you’ve been married before? Liqing, have you forgotten? You’ve already divorced him.”

 

“Divorced…” Song Liqing seemed to be recalling the past, murmuring, “Yes, we divorced. The big bad guy said he was casting me off.”

 

Jun Qiyu involuntarily took a step forward, nearly shouting.

 

“No!” Jun Qiyu said, restraining his voice, “He never cast you off!”

 

Song Liqing heard his voice, tilting his ear and frowning.

 

“Brother Xingxu, who is that standing at the door?”

 

Pei Xingxu shot a glare at Jun Qiyu, blaming him for his impatience.

 

“Oh, a… distant relative.”

 

“A distant relative?” Song Liqing asked in confusion.

 

Pei Xingxu made up a story on the spot, “Yes, a cousin. He’s here to attend our wedding.”

 

“Oh, oh.” Song Liqing relaxed and said happily, “Then why are you making your cousin stand at the door? Cousin, come over here.”

 

Jun Qiyu was taken aback by this unexpected warmth. It was a rare occurrence for Song Liqing to be so welcoming to him!

 

But if he got too close, he feared he might be exposed, scaring Song Liqing away.

 

Torn with indecision, Jun Qiyu didn’t know whether to go forward or not.

 

Pei Xingxu cleared his throat and said, “Cousin, you should speak up. You haven’t had dinner, have you? Come join us.”

 

“Yes, yes.” Song Liqing added, “Come eat with us. Best if you finish it all—don’t leave me any.”

 

It was clear how much Song Liqing disliked the food.

 

“Alright.”

 

Jun Qiyu deliberately altered his voice and kept his words brief to avoid being recognized.

 

Song Liqing, fumbling a bit, pushed the dish toward Jun Qiyu.

 

“Eat up, eat up,” Song Liqing said, looking at his blurry outline. “You’re so big; you must like eating meat, right?”

 

Jun Qiyu, humoring him, said, “I do.”

 

Song Liqing pushed almost all of the dishes aside, barely eating any of the meat. The table was filled with dishes meant to nourish energy and blood, yet most of it ended up in the stomach of the one who needed nourishment the least.

 

Guansheng, sitting on Pei Xingxu’s lap, was happily munching on a piece of milk dumpling. When Jun Qiyu entered, Guansheng, with his round eyes, stared at him without blinking, then stretched out his little hand to try and hit him. However, his limbs were short and clumsy, and he missed, nearly falling off Pei Xingxu’s lap.

 

“Bad thing!” Guansheng pouted and uttered a new word.

 

“Huh?” Pei Xingxu exclaimed in surprise, “Guansheng, where did you learn to curse? You can’t just curse people, especially guests.”

 

Guansheng babbled and repeated the words at Jun Qiyu.

 

“Bad thing… bad thing…”

 

Jun Qiyu rubbed his nose. How could even a child not like him?

 

Was he really born so annoying?

 

Children naturally learn by imitation, and the one who started it looked somewhat embarrassed.

 

Song Liqing smiled apologetically and said, “Cousin, he’s not cursing you, he’s cursing someone else.”

 

“It’s fine.”

 

Jun Qiyu replied briefly.

 

Song Liqing then turned and scolded Guansheng, somewhat guilty, “Guansheng, what’s wrong with you? You’re learning all the bad things… I never taught you to curse.”

 

Jun Qiyu already knew.

 

The phrase “bad thing” was most likely something Guansheng had learned from Song Liqing, and he said it so well, almost with an angry tone.

 

Song Liqing probably referred to him as a “bad thing” often, didn’t he?

 

Jun Qiyu didn’t know whether to be happy or sad. At least he was mentioned… better than not being mentioned at all.

 

This was the most suffocating and uncomfortable meal Jun Qiyu had ever had. He had to speak in a disguised voice, watch Song Liqing and Pei Xingxu grow closer, and be assigned the identity of a “distant cousin.”

 

The once proud little demon, Jun Qiyu, had never been this humble.

 

At night, Jun Qiyu sat on the palace roof to get some fresh air. He held a jug of wine, drinking it as if it were water. But he couldn’t get drunk easily, and the fruit wine from Loulan didn’t make him drunk either; the more he drank, the more awake he became.

 

It was also the most relaxed day he had in over a year.

 

Song Liqing was still alive, and that was more important than anything. At least now he could relieve half of the burden of guilt he had carried. For the remaining time, he would do everything he could to make up for the love he should have given long ago.

 

But even though Song Liqing’s mind had returned to that of a seven- or eight-year-old child, he still feared him, so much so that he would panic and run away whenever he heard his voice.

 

He had been hurt so badly.

 

So, fear had become ingrained in his instincts.

 

He wanted to avoid him, to run away from him.

 

Yet, Jun Qiyu wanted to tell him that there was no need to run. He had really changed a lot and would never hurt him again.

 

But Jun Qiyu didn’t have the chance, not even the opportunity to get close.

 

He could only watch from afar, guarding him from a distance.

 

Jun Qiyu had a new understanding of love.

 

It turned out that when you loved someone, it first made you humble, as humble as dust.

 

Jun Qiyu lay on the roof eaves, and the wine jug in his hand rolled down, smashing on the ground and scattering into shards of porcelain.

 

A figure below in the corridor jumped in fright.

 

Usually cautious, Jun Qiyu only then noticed this person. The figure patted their chest, as if startled, then silently leaned against the wall, slowly moving forward.

 

A spy?

 

Jun Qiyu hadn’t sent anyone to infiltrate Loulan as a spy.

 

An assassin?

 

He had never seen such a clumsy assassin.

 

Moreover, this person’s destination was the kitchen. He sneaked in quietly and closed the door behind him.

 

Jun Qiyu became interested because the figure looked very familiar to him.

 

If it had been before, even in the dim light of the night, he would have recognized this person’s face immediately. But since his eyes were injured on the snow mountain, his eagle eyes had yet to fully recover.

 

Jun Qiyu leaped down and then recognized the person.

 

It was… Song Liqing!

 

He moved slowly, so he hadn’t noticed Jun Qiyu sitting on the eaves. He was only startled when the wine jug shattered.

 

Nervously, Song Liqing entered the kitchen. He wasn’t familiar with it, so he fumbled around, relying on the scent to guide him. He somehow managed to find half a roasted lamb leg.

 

His stomach growled. Despite not liking lamb, the golden-brown roasted lamb, with no gamey odor, was irresistible. The unique spices from Loulan made him salivate.

 

Just as he was about to take a big bite, tearing off a warm piece of meat, a voice behind him startled him.

 

“Stealing a bite?” Jun Qiyu asked, his voice high-pitched.

 

“No, no, no…” Song Liqing panicked and denied it, “I wasn’t stealing, I was just smelling!”

 

“Are you afraid I’ll tell… Cousin?”

 

Jun Qiyu said awkwardly, trying to imitate the Central Plains accent from the Western Regions.

 

It was a good thing he had spent so much time in the Western Regions; his imitation was quite convincing.

 

Song Liqing quickly dropped the lamb leg and reached for Jun Qiyu’s hand.

 

“Please don’t tell him, please, good cousin. You ate all my dinner, I’m starving. If he finds out, he’ll make me eat deer antler every day.”

 

“Then why didn’t you eat more at dinner?” Jun Qiyu asked sternly.

 

Song Liqing made a bitter face and said, “I’ve been eating those dishes for half a year, I just can’t swallow them. I’m too embarrassed to tell Brother Xingxu, the Loulan chefs are so bad. Even my family’s old cook can make better porridge than this. Cousin, if you tell on me… I’ll starve to death.”

 

When he begged like that, Jun Qiyu’s heart softened.

 

He knew best how picky Song Liqing had always been, and how much harder it had become for him to swallow after his blood deficiency disease. He would often throw up.

 

Now that Song Liqing finally had an appetite, Jun Qiyu couldn’t bear to see him suffer.