The three idiots who couldn't become heroes are preparing a man's meal today as well. - Chapter 114

TLN: Sorry for the late update or upload, taking care of sick parent was took so much time that I don’t have any time to do this series TL, Im unlocking all of the chapter since it’s not worth it behind the paywall in my opinion.

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Episode 114. With a Helmet for the Pirates

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A few days later, we once again pushed open the doors of the guild in this town.

This time, it was just us—no soldiers or merchants around.

And since we already met face-to-face last time, there was no need to be overly cautious.

So, we made a grand, confident entrance by pushing open the main entrance doors with both hands.

The result is.

“Man, we’re seriously being stared at.”

“That’s weird. I’m not even wearing black armor, just regular clothes.”

“Was it a bit too flashy? But that captain guy was way flashier, right?”

“Honestly, the armor might’ve been better than this…”

“I think it looks cool though?”

『I don’t think it’s bad either… is it really that bad?』

While each of us spoke freely, the stares from the surroundings gathered, and on top of that, people started whispering rumors.

Come on now, we dressed like we’re ready to go out to sea. What’s the problem?

As I thought that, we walked straight to the counter.

For some reason, it felt like the crowd opened up to make way for us… but let’s just pretend that’s my imagination.

“Welcome… ehhhhh?”

The receptionist froze mid-greeting with a smile still plastered on her face, so I just smiled back and stated our business.

“Is the branch manager here? Oh, and… Drill? Is he around?”

“D-Drill…?”

Whoops? Am I wrong?

Scratching my head while tilting it in confusion—

“It’s not Drill, it’s Daryl. I’ve been waiting for you, Hearty Eater. But… that’s quite the outfit you’ve got there.”

A voice called out from behind, and when I turned around—

There he was, the same as ever in his pirate captain get-up.

“Is it that bad? I thought I picked something pretty decent.”

I flared out the thick, rugged long coat I was wearing—something like that anyway—and he let out a sigh, clearly exasperated.

Apparently, this coat was the sea version of armor—thick and long for protection.

Yeah, now that I think about it, pirates did wear stuff like this.

“Aah, forget it. I’ve got nothing to say. No matter how you look at it, you’re a pirate.”

Hey, you’re one to talk! I almost snapped back, but held it in.

True, we did choose pirate-style clothing.

If we went for any other “man of the sea” image, we’d end up in Japanese-style gear, so that was out.

So here we are in this get-up.

“All of you in all-black outfits, looking big and intimidating. And on top of that… why the hell are you wearing helmets?”

“Protecting your head is basic survival, I’m not skipping that.”

“I apologize… everyone’s so used to wearing armor that they felt uneasy without it… so we all at least took off everything but the helmets… please bear with us.”

Minami bowed repeatedly, looking deeply apologetic while her black coat flapped behind her.

Beside her, the Saintess—who had a blast picking out her outfit—wore a pirate hat and looked smug as anything.

“I always wanted to try cosplay at least once.”

『It suits you, so I think it’s fine? But is it not okay? Maybe people just don’t like black gear, even if it’s not armor?』

She adjusted her hat nonchalantly as she spoke.

Honestly, this town truly lives up to being a port town.

We dressed head-to-toe in pirate clothes we picked out—stuff sturdy enough to stop arrows, apparently.

They were displayed on mannequins like something straight out of a WANTED! poster.

So yeah, me—Azuma—and Nishida wore some tough leather outfits.

And as always, I had my black helmet on.

Minami and the Saintess wore coats—technically called “gestcoats?”—with light gear underneath that looked easy to move in.

Since even chainmail rusts near the sea, we couldn’t really use metal armor, so we opted for durable clothing instead.

Nice. This way, even if we fall into the sea, we should still be able to swim.

That’s what we were going for when we picked out our gear.

“Well… whatever. You’re heading out to sea starting today. Are you ready?”

“Hell yeah, we even carefully picked out and bought our gear.”

“I’m honestly scared to even look at you guys…”

And so, our first job in this town began.

The sea, baby.

Everything about the “hunt” changes—including what we get to eat.

I’m seriously hyped for this.

And so, with hearts full of anticipation, we followed the pirate captain.

……

“The sea!”

“Seasick!”

“Seafood!!”

“Um, like… fish, yeah?!”

“Sea—!”

『Feed me something tasty—!!』

Standing on the deck, we all threw our arms up and shouted.

The sea. The sea!

And we were on a pretty big ship, too.

It was cutting swiftly through the water, heading further and further offshore.

“It’s a common sight for us, but is it unusual for you?”

Captain Daryl called out, his tone tinged with pride.

I could understand his sentiment.

The vast scenery was something we’d always wanted to boast about, as if to say, “We always see this view.”

“This is amazing, Daryl! We could even reenact the Titanic scene here!”

“T-Titanic?”

“Then let’s do a Pirates of the Caribbean act!”

“H-Hey, you guys. It’s dangerous if you go too close to the edge…”

“Ah, I’ll be the one supporting! Also, the pirate villain! Minami-chan, could you bring out your rapier?”

“Eh? Ah, sure.”

The result

Azuma supported me, arms outstretched, in a pose reminiscent of a human pyramid, while with his other hand, he brandished a rapier alongside Nishida.

Yeah, this feels… off.

Returning to our original positions with a sudden sense of calm…

“Satisfied?”

“Yup.”

For now, we’ve done what we wanted.

Time to get to work.

Gathering with somewhat ambiguous expressions, we surveyed our surroundings.

The crew members were all bustling about.

Well, of course—they have to, given the size of this ship.

If I recall correctly, it’s called the Black Dog.

Though it only has a single black stripe.

Apparently, it’s faster than most ships and excels at “dog paddling.”

I’m not entirely sure what that means, but in any case, it’s a fast ship.

“Shall I explain about this ship now?”

“Yes- “Please, Captain.””

We saluted the captain.

It felt like the beginning of an exciting “sea hunt.”

……..

“Retreat! Everyone, get inside the ship! If they see us, they’ll attack! Hey, you guys should probably retreat too!”

A swarm of “flying fish” approached from all directions.

These were also magical beasts.

With prominent spikes—or were they horns?—on their noses, they advanced toward the ship.

But so what?

It’s been a while since we’ve had such a big catch.

“Minami! Nishida! Knock down as many as you can! Azuma, protect Saintess while securing the prey! Saintess duo! Collect our dinner!”

“Understood!”

“I-I’ll do my best! But can we eat flying fish?”

“Wow, they’re falling like rain.”

“Shaaaa!”

Swinging my spear with both hands, I relentlessly struck down the incoming fish.

Just as the dragon girl said, it truly was like rain.

The sharp spikes they aimed at us meant we had to keep moving, or risk getting pierced all over.

However, midway through their leap, they began flailing in the air… Were they trying to escape, like the forest beasts?

“Hahaha! A massive haul! We’ve had a streak of bad luck, but now we won’t have to worry about food for a while, Kou-chan!”

“They’re coming at us like crazy. If only birds came this abundantly…”

The two dashed around, swinging their short swords with incredible speed.

Using crossbows on this many fish would deplete ammo quickly, so Minami had switched to knives.

Their outfits added to their pirate-like appearance.

“Hyiiiii!? One just slammed right in front of me! This fish is stuck in the deck!?”

“Nozomi-chan, stay behind the shield, okay? It’s genuinely dangerous.”

Behind Azuma who was using a large shield to block the fish rain, Saintess had fallen on her backside, startled by a flying fish embedded in the deck.

Hey, are you alright?

“Nozomi and Kana duo, if it’s too much, feel free to retreat. It’s tough to get used to this suddenly.”

As I spoke, swinging my spear…

『 Then I’ll try to help a bit.』 

“Kana? That might get you scolded, so maybe don’t…”

The dragon girl declared confidently, while the Saintess, seemingly sensing something, wore a bitter expression.

Oh? What’s going on?

Did control of the body switch? Does the dragon girl excel at offensive magic?

Curious, I watched intently.

“Everyone, step back a bit. Here comes ‘Breath’!”

Opening her mouth wide, a familiar flash of light engulfed the approaching fish swarm.

Though it seemed narrower and less powerful than the breath I had experienced before…

“Ah… The fish.”

“They’ve disappeared, haven’t they…”

The fish that had leapt high into the air instantly turned to dust, and perhaps frightened by her magic, their pursuit completely stopped.

The deck became very, very quiet.

While no one spoke, there was one person alone who snorted proudly and puffed out her chest—the dragon girl.

『It’s safe now!』

She looked at us as if demanding praise.

“Kana, hey, Dragon girl. Seiza.”

『Huh?』

And so began a discussion lasting about an hour.

……..

“Heh heh, quite something. This cost a pretty penny.”

Glancing over the receipts for the equipment purchased for those “Hearty Eaters,” I couldn’t help but smirk.

As a merchant, I suppose I should say something like “That was an expensive expense,” but still—

Thinking about what kind of feats they were pulling off now, wielding the equipment I bought them, I couldn’t help but smile.

I took them to the best store I knew that handled top-tier gear, bought some ready-made equipment for now, and arranged for custom gear later.

The clothes, the weapons—equipping a whole party like that costs a considerable sum.

They insisted stubbornly that they would pay me back later, which I took as a sign of their sincerity.

An ordinary Walker could never say such a thing about that kind of money.

If a noble bought it, they would happily accept it without hesitation.

And yet…

“It’s not bad… but I shouldn’t be too greedy. I’ll go with this.”

“When compared to our smithy, it’s hard to match… well, as long as they have enough, it should be fine.”

“Um… excuse me! Do you have any shields bigger and thicker than this?”

Especially with weapons, they kept going on like that.

You can tell by looking at the gear they use—it’s abnormal.

From the strange designs to the outstanding quality.

If you always use such equipment, even when brought to a high-class store, that’s the kind of impression you get.

And then they bought a mountain of weapons.

They plan to use all of them up, which is terrifying.

Even when looking at the bill, they seemed unfazed.

In other words, they’re accustomed to dealing with sums of that scale.

Very interesting, both as a merchant and as an individual.

I already know by their level that they’re no ordinary people… but what exactly will they pull off?

I’m looking forward to it.

More than that, I can “buy” their trust by providing their “equipment.”

Though it sounds unpleasant, the weapon I wield is “money.”

Using it to the fullest, I build a relationship with them.

That’s why even a receipt with such huge numbers looks like a treasure to me.

At least, it feels like a ticket to becoming someone they can rely on while they’re in this town.

“I need to prepare various things before they come back… I don’t think they’ll earn enough to repay everything at once… but just in case.”

Muttering to myself, I reviewed the documents for their custom equipment.

I’ll say it again—I’m a merchant.

Someone who hides behind others in battle.

But even so, just looking at these blueprints for their gear makes my heart race.

“Even at this age… maybe I really am still a boy at heart.”

Smirking softly as I got absorbed in the documents, I heard a knock at the door.

Then—

“Excuse me, Father.”

“Sara, are you feeling better now?”

Since they’d been poisoned by bandits, I’d kept her resting at home… but it seemed the worst was over.

“Well… what about them?”

“They went out to sea. Who knows what they’re hunting this time.”

Laughing, I showed her the receipts; Sara sighed gloomily.

“Both the sea and forest are dangerous right now… I hope they’re okay. I want to thank them directly once again.”

Patting my worried daughter’s head, I confidently said

“They don’t look like men ready to die just yet. They might be reckless or foolhardy, but they’re the type to respect the dead line. They won’t step over that last edge—they focus on defense. That’s how I see it. So, they’ll be fine.”

“I hope so…”

Still looking uneasy, Sara drew closer, and I resumed organizing the documents.

She kept staring at the names of the items they’d bought.

Ah, truly.

Though I’m a merchant and it’s a dream I can’t quite reach—

I can’t help but want to see their exploits with my own eyes again.

Maybe that means my heart is still a child, after all.