The three idiots who couldn't become heroes are preparing a man's meal today as well. - Chapter 16

Chapter 16: A Request That Feels Like Another World

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As soon as we returned to town, we headed straight for the Walker Guild.

It was already nearing evening, and the streets were starting to empty. Still, we figured it was best to hear the details of the request as soon as possible.

With that in mind, we all gathered and made our way to the branch chief’s office.

“I refuse to accept this! Why am I not allowed to depart first!? If the others are lagging behind, just let them catch up later!”

The moment we opened the door, an angry voice rang out.

So, naturally, we closed it again.

It seemed we had walked in on something troublesome.

I could’ve sworn the exhausted branch chief glanced at us, but I pretended not to notice.

“Shall we head back? To the forest?”

“Sounds good.”

“Agreed.”

“No, no, no, that’s not how this works.”

“If you’re going to leave, at least go to an inn…”

Just as we were exchanging thoughts, the door suddenly swung open with great force.

A blonde girl stood there, glaring at us with sharp eyes.

Why, though?

“You’re late!”

For some reason, I was suddenly getting scolded.

Wait… I think I’ve seen this girl before.

That platinum-gold hair.

Those blue eyes.

I feel like we had a short conversation somewhere…

“Oh, you’re the one who forgot their helmet.”

“Stop remembering me like that!”

The person peeking out from behind the door—

If I wasn’t mistaken, she was the tsundere I met about a week ago at the guild’s training grounds.

“You guys got here fast… Were you nearby?”

“Well, yeah, something like that.”

After a brief exchange, we entered the branch chief’s office and lined up along the wall.

Aside from us and the branch chief, there were eight other people in the room.

They were split into two groups of four, so they were probably separate parties.

With this many people, even the spacious office felt cramped.

Was this request really something that required so many hands?

The tsundere from earlier was one thing, but the other party looked seriously strong.

“Now that everyone is here, we can leave immediately, correct?”

“Hold on, hold on. I haven’t even explained the request to them yet. Besides, you expect them to head out right after just returning?”

“That’s why I said we don’t need rookies! In the first place, I alone am more than capable of handling this—”

The blonde girl was snapping at the branch chief.

This conversation was going nowhere fast.

While they continued arguing, I approached the other party.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Kitayama, from the party ‘Hearty Eater’ If you know the details of this request, would you mind filling me in?”

I directed my question toward the guy who seemed to be their leader—

A huge, rugged man carrying an oversized, brutal-looking sword.

I had a feeling their party name was something like ‘Berserkers.’

Yeah, that had to be it.

“Well, that’s surprising. It’s been a while since a fellow Walker greeted me so politely.”

Despite his intimidating appearance, the man widened his eyes in surprise.

Was it really that shocking?

Did I need to act more like a rough-and-tumble adventurer?

Like—”Yo, name’s Kitayama! Let’s wreck some monsters together!”

…Ugh, just imagining it made me cringe. It’d make me look like such a tryhard.

“Sorry, sorry. It’s just rare for someone to talk to me so normally. I’m Kyle, the leader of our party. Our name is… uh… ‘Warwind.’”

Kyle muttered their party name awkwardly, looking away as if embarrassed.

Huh.

Was it just me, or was this guy a kindred spirit?

“By any chance… did the guild decide your party name without asking you?”

I leaned in and whispered.

Kyle’s eyes widened again—

This time with an expression of pure shock, as if he were about to say, “No way…!”

“Yeah… My party members and the guild staff got carried away and just slapped a name on us. Wait, don’t tell me—your party too? ‘Hearty Eaters’?”

“Ours was named by a guild staff member who’s technically a temporary member… I never expected to meet someone else in the same boat. ‘Warwind.’”

At this point, we had both crouched in the corner of the room, whispering like conspirators.

It must have looked ridiculous—two grown men huddled together, muttering to each other.

But it couldn’t be helped.

Because honestly?

Announcing those names was just embarrassing.

Now that we had found solidarity in our suffering—

“”Comrade!””

We clasped hands firmly, having found a new bond.

After that, we gathered both our parties together.

 

“As for this request, to put it simply, it’s a rescue mission. And it’s an expedition at that—just getting there will take three days by carriage. The target for rescue is a high-ranking noble’s daughter. Normally, this would be the job of knights or guards… but since it’s urgent, they’ve also turned to Walkers. Moving national forces takes time, after all.”

Kyle-san explained bluntly, but he covered all the key points.

That was really helpful, especially for us who are still beginners in this world.

Unlike the bickering idiot and the tsundere still arguing in the background.

“They sent out a ‘bird’ on the day of the attack and requested help from both us and the knights… but to be honest, it’s a race against time. That noble lady apparently has a strong talent for magic, so if she’s been putting up barriers one after another while holed up, she might be able to last at most four days.”

“And why four days exactly? Is there some specific intel on that?”

I asked a simple question, but Kyle-san made a bitter face and shook his head.

“That’s only in the best-case scenario. Nobles tend to choose preserved food with good taste, but that only lasts about a week. The place she was taken from was about two days away from the city. Considering the time that has passed since the attack… that’s the situation we’re looking at. The request itself was something like, ‘Our lady has been kidnapped. Please send aid.’ That means, assuming all their supplies are intact, that they successfully rescued the lady, and that they’re still holed up… four days is the limit. Honestly, it wouldn’t be surprising if we were already too late.”

“That seems overly optimistic… But if they already managed to rescue the lady, wouldn’t they be able to return on their own?”

It was a fair question. If they had someone strong enough to pull off the rescue, wouldn’t Walkers like us be unnecessary?

But Kyle-san shook his head again.

This guy sure shakes his head a lot.

“If that were the case, they would’ve sent another ‘bird’ to call off the rescue. Even if the bird died, there are other ways—like sending one person back on horseback to report. But so far, there’s been nothing. That means either they’re in a situation where they can’t even send a bird, or they haven’t managed to rescue her yet. Or maybe… they’re all dead. In that case, our job would be to recover their remains.”

Since we still didn’t fully grasp the norms of this world, it was hard to say anything definitively… but it all seemed incredibly inconvenient.

For example, what if they had succeeded in rescuing her, but their horse and bird had died?

Or what if everything else was intact, but the lady had already been killed?

Or maybe everyone survived and they were just making their way back on foot?

Various possibilities ran through my mind, but there was no way to confirm anything.

There were no convenient smartphones here, after all.

What still bugged me, though, was the identity of the kidnappers.

Who even kidnapped her? Bandits or something?

If it had been a magical beast, she’d already be bones by now unless her allies had some serious skills.

“I understand the situation. So… who’s the enemy this time? That changes how we handle things significantly.”

My companions also nodded seriously at my question.

And in response, Kyle-san muttered the name of our enemy.

“Goblins.”

“Goblins, huh…”

For some reason, this was the first time since coming to this world that I felt like we were taking on a proper “otherworldly quest.”

———

 

In the end, we set off that same day, boarding the carriage lent to us by the guild.

Airi-san offered to take the reins as the coachman, while the rest of us climbed into the back of the wagon.

“…My ass hurts.”

“Let’s put down some fur pelts. My ass is gonna split otherwise…”

“That might be a good idea… Let’s layer a few.”

“I’ll prepare them. Airi-san, would you like some as well?”

“Thank you, I’d appreciate it.”

After making sure Airi-san was also taken care of, we pulled out the fur pelts one by one.

This should make things a little more bearable—

Just as I thought that, the carriage suddenly stopped.

Has something happened?! We all rushed outside in alarm—

“We’ll be camping here for the night. It’s getting dark.”

Standing by the carriage, explaining to Kyle-san, was a blonde girl with twin tails.

Her hairstyle was cute, but now wasn’t the time to be thinking about that.

Wait, we were setting up camp already? It was still so bright out.

The sky was painted in shades of sunset, but we still had time to keep moving.

At this rate, who knew how long it would take to reach our destination?

“Oi, are we seriously stopping this early? We just need to follow the river road, right?”

As I approached and asked, the blonde girl scowled and clicked her tongue.

This damn brat… One day, I’m gonna make her cry like in one of those ero doujins.

“This is why amateurs are such a pain… We have a large group. We need to secure a campsite early and travel as much as possible while the sun is up.”

“But isn’t this way too early? Each party sets up their own tent, right? That means it’s no different from usual. If we start now, we’ll be resting for like ten hours unless we set out before dawn.”

“What’s with that obvious statement? You really are a rookie. You don’t even know the basics of camping? Why did the guildmaster even assign you to the rescue team…?”

“…Wait. Hold on. Are you seriously saying we’re gonna rest for ten whole hours?”

I raised my voice in disbelief, and Kyle-san patted my shoulder.

Then, as expected, he shook his head.

We hadn’t even known each other for long, but I was already used to seeing him do that.

“The young lady’s camping style includes nobles. That means longer rest periods. But resting is important—for the horses, for the group. If all you have is tasteless rations, you won’t last without proper breaks.”

Ah, I’d forgotten.

In this world, travel meant surviving on preserved food.

They should at least pack fresh ingredients while they still last, but I guess that depends on the season.

Not everyone had a magic bag.

We’d been taking advantage of a lot of conveniences, so maybe that’s why this all felt so frustrating.

“…Fine, we’ll follow the plan.”

“You should’ve just said so from the start, rookie.”

Normally, I’d just brush off the yapping of a cute girl as harmless banter.

But right now, her words really pissed me off.

Because at this very moment, the ones waiting for our help could be terrified.

They could be on the brink of life or death.

Thinking about that made something inside me boil with anger.

“Ko-chan, calm down. The ‘other side’ probably had the same approach for rescue teams too, don’t you think?”

“If it were just us, we might be able to move faster. But we don’t even know if we can save them on our own. That’s why we should follow the ‘rules’ of this side.”

“…Yeah, my bad.”

With that, we began preparing for camp.

I hadn’t fully accepted it, but I swallowed the reasoning.

At the very least, I planned to eat my fill before sleeping tonight.

(Kyle POV)

A joint mission with the parties “Soothing Spirit” and “Hearty Eater.”

At first, I wasn’t sure how it would turn out, but Hearty Eater seemed to be adapting quickly. So far, no problems have arisen.

As for the Soothing Spirit, well, they were exactly as the rumors and their appearance suggested—full of aristocratic pride, flaunting their status.

There were plenty of moments that made me grit my teeth, but I held back.

After all, these were nobles.

If I snapped at them here, it would just lead to a headache down the line.

Meanwhile, Hearty Eater’s leader was a passionate guy.

His frustration was palpable as he glared at the Soothing Spirits party.

He was barely being restrained by his comrades, but his desire to rush to the rescue as soon as possible was written all over his face.

Despite that, he ultimately settled down and continued setting up camp.

“Kyle, what do you think?”

One of my party members, an elven archer, called out to me.

His name was Riri.

Being an elf and bearing his particular title, he had exceptional eyesight and hearing.

Maybe he had even overheard Hearty Eater’s conversation.

“Green. Way too green. But I don’t hate it. I kinda like that kind of passion.”

“Haha, there it is. Our leader’s signature gut feeling.”

The one who chuckled was Poal, our scout.

A small-statured girl, she laughed as she set fire to the gathered wood before dashing off to collect more.

“Not bad. Not bad, but… they’re too clean. From what I can see, they seem skilled, but there’s not a single speck of dirt on them. It’s strange.”

“So, you see it too, Zaz?”

Our mage, Zaz.

He was also an elf, meaning he had probably observed all kinds of humans before.

And yet, he found Hearty Eater unsettling.

That was telling.

Hearty Eater was oddly familiar with setting up camp and maintaining vigilance.

Even we couldn’t set up a campsite as efficiently as they did.

Not only that, but they were constantly keeping watch.

That sharp awareness radiated from them.

What kind of environment would someone have to grow up in to become like that?

They were chatting and laughing, but at the same time, they never stopped scanning their surroundings.

It was as if they were always expecting to be attacked.

What are those guys?

I didn’t think they were bad people, but still… something was off.

Just as those thoughts crossed my mind and I started chewing on some dried meat, something unexpected happened.

“Hey… are those guys cooking?”

“No way. Are they seriously letting their guard down that much? Do they think they can just rely on us if something happens?”

“No… they haven’t lowered their guard. Even while cooking, they can immediately grab their weapons.”

Hearing that, I took another look.

True enough, their weapons were always within arm’s reach.

But still, could they really stay on alert while preparing a meal?

Doubt creeping in, I picked up a nearby stone and tossed it toward them.

And then—

“…!”

The moment I threw it, the men locked eyes with me.

And when the stone landed near them, the slave girl turned to stare at me too.

Their silent gazes sent a chill down my spine, as if they were wordlessly asking:

“What do you want?”

“I told you, didn’t I? Cheap provocations will only bring you ruin.”

Zaz sipped his terrible tea with a grimace.

On expeditions like this, you couldn’t eat or drink anything decent.

The sooner this job is over, the better.

“…What are those guys?”

“Hunters. That’s the only word that fits.”

After that, no one spoke.

We simply gnawed on our bland rations in silence.