The three idiots who couldn't become heroes are preparing a man's meal today as well. - Chapter 8

Episode 8: Salt-Grilled River Fish and Sautéed White Fish

---

[Minami POV]

It’s the third day since I was bought as a slave.

I found myself surprisingly at ease in the forest.

If you asked me what I was doing—I was fishing.

Apparently, since we prepared the magical beast meat we got yesterday, today was meant to be a more relaxing day.

Kitayama-sama was busy seasoning and cutting up the mountain of meat. Nishida-sama was out foraging for medicinal herbs and wild vegetables.

And beside me, Azuma-sama was casting a fishing line.

“Hope we catch some fish.”

“Uh… yes.”

In the end, I ate the magical beast meat.

I actually ate it.

Memories of being trapped in the underground slave dungeon flashed through my mind, but faced with something so delicious-looking, I couldn’t help but reach for it.

How careless. How foolish.

Even as I thought that, the boar meat was unbelievably delicious.

I’d suspected I was being used as some sort of test subject… but the masters ate it too, without hesitation.

Had the common sense of the world changed while I was confined underground? They devoured it with such gusto that I couldn’t help but wonder.

They’d brushed the surface with grated garlic and soy sauce, then seared it over an open flame.

Judging from the rich aroma, they probably used mirin and sake as well.

The smell alone was overwhelming.

But above all, the taste—

I’d barely had the chance to eat meat before, but this was on another level.

The moment I bit into it, juices burst forth.

It was as if I were drinking it—the savory, flavorful oils spreading through my mouth. The meat itself was springy and tender, absolutely delicious.

There were no tough sinews, the heat-treated boar meat grew richer with flavor the more I chewed.

And it was soft, unbelievably so.

Was it because it was magical beast meat? Or was the cooking simply that skilled?

It was never tough to bite through.

I couldn’t stop eating, tossing piece after piece into my mouth.

A proper slave would never be allowed such indulgence.

Snapping back to reality, I cautiously glanced at the masters—

“The soup’s great too. Try some.”

All of them smiled warmly as Nishida-sama offered me a bowl of soup.

Surrounded by grinning bandits, I sipped the golden broth—and my understanding of the world flipped upside down.

Was this what soup was supposed to be? I couldn’t help but drink it all in one go.

The rabbit fat added richness, the mountain carrots infused the soup with sweetness, and the consomme seasoning was perfectly balanced.

There were mushrooms in it that I’d never seen before, but when I bit into them, they had the texture and flavor of meat.

I was happy.

I never imagined I’d get to eat something so delicious, and to my heart’s content.

Slaves typically live on their master’s leftovers.

Going without meals entirely wasn’t unusual.

Back at the slave trader’s, even the soup was just scraps of vegetables and a pinch of salt—forget about meat.

And yet, here I was.

No matter how much I ate, no one scolded me. In fact, they praised me: “Eat as much as you want,” and “You’re not picky—how admirable!”

Sure, it was cursed magical beast meat. But with how delicious it was, I felt like I didn’t care if it was cursed.

That’s how good it was.

And the masters were all kind.

They didn’t yell or hit me.

Most of all, they fed me delicious food until I was full.

Was it really okay to be this happy?

That thought lingered in my mind as I drifted off to sleep last night—wrapped in a blanket softer and more luxurious than anything even the masters had.

Honestly, I still can’t believe it.

Could this really be happening?

And even today, they’re all fired up, saying things like, “We’ll feed you something even better than yesterday!”

Something better than yesterday… I wonder what it could be.

“Nan-chan, getting sleepy? You’re drooling.”

“Hah!? I’m sorry, Azuma-sama! I’m fine!”

I had completely drifted back into yesterday’s memories.

My current job was to catch fish.

I needed to focus, to be useful to the masters and help gather more food.

“Oh? Got a bite?”

With a casual look, Azuma-sama reeled in the line.

Dangling from the end was something large—probably around 50 cm long.

A Piraq, a man-eating fish.

It’s a magical beast known to attack humans and animals in groups when they enter the water.

Technically, it might be more accurate to call it a magical fish, but people tend to lump them all under “magical beasts.”

But to these people, it’s just food.

This was already Azuma-sama’s third catch.

Meanwhile, I hadn’t caught a single one.

“I-I’ll do my best too!”

“Yeah, let’s do our best. But fishing’s partly luck, so don’t stress too much, okay?”

Even so, it was frustrating to be so useless.

I wanted to prove I could be helpful—at least by catching one fish.

Just as I was thinking that, I felt a small tug on my fishing rod.

“Ah! I think I’ve got one!”

“Ooh, good luck! But don’t lean too far forward or—”

The next moment, I was yanked forward with tremendous force.

…Huh? What’s happening?

Before I could process it, my body was airborne.

I’d been sitting on a rock, but now I was falling headfirst toward the river.

And in that river—waiting below—were the same man-eating fish we’d been pulling out all morning.

If prey like me got tossed in there… it didn’t take much imagination to figure out what would happen.

“N-No…!”

A short scream escaped my lips as the water’s surface rushed up to meet me.

At that moment—

“Mayday! Mayday! Mayday! Requesting rescue in the river!”

With Azuma-sama’s loud shout, I found myself cradled securely in his arms.

The next instant, SPLAAAASH!—a massive sound erupted as we plunged into the water.

Opening my eyes, I saw a school of Piraq swimming everywhere, their gazes fixed directly on us.

This is bad. There are clearly too many.

At this rate, we’d be picked clean to the bone in mere seconds.

At the very least, if I could act as a decoy, Azuma-sama might—

Just as that thought crossed my mind, I saw a small pouch being tossed into the water ahead of us.

From the pouch’s opening, a red powder spread, dissolving into the water.

What is that…?

SPLASH! SPLASH!—the sound of two more bodies entering the water.

I only caught a glimpse, but there was no mistaking it—it was Kitayama-sama and Nishida-sama.

No, no, no—this is bad.

Piraq hunt by sound and scent. If this keeps up, everyone…

But—surprisingly—the Piraq swam away, drawn to the red powder, distancing themselves from us.

What on earth…?

Just as I wondered, SPLASH!—with another dramatic sound, Azuma-sama hurled me onto the riverbank.

“Masters!”

The thought of them becoming Piraq food because of me—unthinkable.

If they’d been despicable masters, maybe I wouldn’t have cared.
Might’ve even wished for it.

But they’re different.

Despite it being magical beast meat, they gave me proper meals.
They entrusted me with the job of dismantling, never forcing me into reckless tasks.

If kind masters like them were to die because of me…

To other slaves, they’d probably be considered a “jackpot” of masters.
If they were gone—

Just thinking about it sent a chilling wave through my body.

“No… Please… If a decoy’s needed, I’ll do it! Just… please!”

On the verge of tears, I tried to rush back into the river—

SPLAAASH!

Three figures in full plate armor emerged dramatically from the water.

…Huh?

“Good job, Minami. Never thought jumping in would be faster.”

“Unorthodox, but not bad. As long as we’ve got red herbs, we’ll manage.”

“Total accident, though. You okay, Minami-chan?”

Water gushed from every crevice in their armor, spraying from their helmets with a whoosh.

And yet, in each of their hands, they held a large Piraq.

Including the three Azuma-sama caught earlier—that’s nine in total.

Plenty to feed the four of us.

The armored figures clanked noisily as they waded ashore.

It was bizarre.

No one dives into a river in full plate armor.

“Well, in any case, glad no one got hurt. I’ll keep prepping the food. Nishida, if you’re done foraging, start mixing the herbs. Azuma, help Minami clean the fish.”

Kitayama-sama helped me to my feet as he spoke.

But—

“Um, Master… there’s a Piraq stuck to your back.”

“Oh? Seriously? Mind getting it off?”

Turning around, I saw a Piraq, around 30 cm long, biting into the armor at his waist.

A fishing line extended from its mouth, and when I tugged on it—my fishing rod surfaced from the river.

Could it be…?

“You did it, Minami-chan. Your first catch!”

Azuma-sama patted my shoulder, snapping me out of my daze.

This Piraq—it’s the one I was trying to catch.

No, the one that dragged me into the river.

“Ooh, Minami-chan’s first hunt, huh? Go on, finish it off.”

Nishida-sama handed me a knife.

I accepted it instinctively—but I’ve never killed anything before.

Even when I learned disassembly, it was always after the creature was already dead.

And so, facing the still-flopping fish by the river, I froze with the knife in hand.

“You don’t have to force it. But eating means doing this, you know?”

Kitayama-sama ruffled my soaked hair roughly, his voice tinged with melancholy as he reached to take the knife from me.

But—

“I-I’ll do it! This is my prey!”

Clutching the knife tightly, I declared it.

The fish before me—a Piraq.

A magical beast feared for even consuming human flesh.

But that’s exactly why—this is my duty.

I can do it.
I can kill it.

“Haaa haaaaah *Heavy pant”

Before I knew it, my breathing grew ragged.
The hand holding the knife trembled violently.

But I had to do this.
I had to show my masters that even I could be useful.

Fueled by that determination, I raised the knife high—

However—

“Listen, Minami. Taking a life isn’t always a bad thing. Killing to eat—that’s just natural. And you see, with fish…”

Kitayama-sama took my hand and guided it, pointing the knife towards the gills of the Piraq.

And then—

“Got it? If you can’t do it, say so. Right now.”

“I-I’m fine. I can do it…”

The moment I answered, the knife slid smoothly into the Piraq’s gills.

I felt the sensation of cutting through something, but it didn’t feel anything like the “killing” I had imagined.

And yet, the Piraq twitched slightly and soon stopped moving.

Huh? Wait… did I just kill it?

While I was still processing that thought, Kitayama-sama gently patted my head.

“I’m not saying you have to get used to it. But if we want to live and eat, we have no choice but to kill. So, it’s okay to apologize. It’s okay to curse it if you want. But unless it’s for food, try not to kill if you can help it. Got it?”

“…Y-Yes! Understood.”

This was the first lesson I received from my master, after having lived my life as a slave.

 

(Kitayama POV)

And so, today’s a fish party!

Yaaay!

Minami’s feeling a bit down from her first hunt, but let’s shake that off by making something delicious!

Today’s menu is all about fish.

We’ll teach her that by killing and eating, it becomes nourishment for us.

So, we’re keeping it simple: grilled fish with salt and fish sauté.

After cleaning it, I realized this Piraq, or whatever you call this man-eating fish, has surprisingly beautiful white meat.

Thick and plump, too.

I think it’s a freshwater fish, but who knows? It was in the river, so yeah—freshwater fish, as expected.

For the salted grill, I rubbed in as much salt as possible, even packing the tail with it. Then, as usual, skewered it with a spear.

I wanted to grill it leisurely on skewers, but unfortunately, these guys are all huge.

After gutting, rinsing, salting, and skewering them—done. Super simple.

Today’s all about fish instead of meat.

I left that to Nishida and Azuma.

Apparently, it feels like playing real-life MonH*n or something, and they’re having fun.

Though honestly, grilling takes a lot of time and effort, so you’d think they’d get bored quickly.

Next up, white fish sauté.

I say “sauté” to sound fancy, but really, it’s just fish fried with butter and soy sauce.

I don’t even know the proper definition of sauté.

Basically, if you season it and cook it in a frying pan, it’s sauté. That’s it.

Doesn’t matter if I’m wrong—if the cook calls it sauté, then it’s sauté.

So, for ingredients: soy sauce, sake, and, of course, butter.

Also, some veggies Nishida foraged, sliced up to grill alongside the fish.

In this world, vegetables literally grow everywhere.

I was seriously shocked when I pulled up some random vines and found potatoes attached.

Apparently, there are magical beasts that cultivate vegetables. I’d love to meet one someday.

While Nishida and Azuma spun the skewers, I started on the sauté.

“Um, Master… Is there anything I can help with?”

Minami, looking a bit idle, came over, so I had her assist.

First, we sprinkled salt and pepper on the fish she had neatly filleted.

I told her when to stop, then tossed butter into a heated frying pan.

Not sure if it’s necessary, but I also added thinly sliced garlic for aroma.

Next, we laid the seasoned fish skin-side down, frying until it browned.

Once it was cooked through, we flipped it to cook the other side.

Minami let out an “Ah!”—apparently, she’d broken a piece of the fish.

I get it. Fish falls apart easily if you mess with it too much.

No big deal. I reassured her, then added sake and soy sauce.

With a satisfying sizzle and mouthwatering aroma, I covered the pan with a lid.

A few minutes later, just as the grilling team shouted, “I think it’s done!” I opened the lid.

“Mm, looks good. Ours is done too.”

With that, we laid out a feast of fish on the table.

Not many dishes, but plenty of food.

Minami hesitantly raised her hand.

“Um… Is it okay for me to eat? I was a burden to Master today. I don’t deserve to eat…”

She started saying something strange.

Still dwelling on what happened earlier, huh?

Honestly, that wasn’t even a real mistake.

I wish I could show her how we were at the start—getting sick from eating weird stuff or dropping meat into the fire mid-cook.

“In that case, Minami, I command you as your master.”

“”Hold up, Leader!”” the two idiots chimed in, egging me on, but I ignored them and faced Minami.

And then—

“Eat without being picky. Eat until you’re full. That’s an order! Alright, let’s dig in!”

“Let’s eat!”

“Uh, um… Let’s eat.”

Despite the fuss, everyone started eating at once.

Though Minami was hesitant, we kept piling food onto her plate until it was stacked high.

After that, it turned into an all-out scramble among the guys.

The grilled fish was fluffy and flavorful, the sauté bursting with the richness of the seasonings.

You had to eat—missing out would be a regret.

Even the assorted vegetables, which might’ve been left untouched otherwise, became part of the frenzy.

It was all delicious.

Carrots, despite growing wild, were sweet, and they softened quickly when cooked.

The potatoes were fluffy and melted in our mouths, soaking up the flavors from the sauté.

Maybe it’s because it was the result of our hard work, or perhaps magical beasts just taste better than regular animals.

Whatever it was, we couldn’t stop eating.

Even the vegetables were delicious—this world’s food is something else.

“Hey! I was eyeing that fish!”

“Too slow! This one’s mine.”

“Guess I’ll grab some veggies, then. Man… they’re good. Why are the flavors so rich?”

We joked around as usual, and once things settled, I glanced over at Minami.

We’d been so caught up in the food frenzy… Did she get enough?

I worried as I looked over, but—

“It’s really delicious. Thank you so much.”

Tears welled in the corners of her eyes as she continued eating heartily from her still-full plate.

Mm, very good.

For kids, eating well is the most important thing.

It seemed I wasn’t the only one thinking that, as everyone watched Minami with warm smiles.

And thus, our second night of camping, now with Minami, came to an end.

At first, I was worried, but it looks like she’s fitting in just fine.

At this rate, a week should be a breeze.

Anyway, the priority is to help her regain her strength and fill out.

Starting tomorrow, we’ll gather more nutritious meat and vegetables.

With that determination in our hearts, we continued our fish feast.