Xie Chichun - Chapter 17

Xie Xuan looked at the shifting expressions on her sister’s face and asked again, “Sister, did you tell her? Did you tell anyone else besides Lady Yue?”

“I did mention it to Lady Yue, but—” Xie Jun suddenly stood up, shaking her head and muttering, “Lady Yue couldn’t have done such a thing. Impossible. Xuanxuan, many people knew about this at Xie Pond yesterday. It doesn’t have to be her. She’s always taken care of us since we were young. How could she have informed Lady Luo and told her to kill you?”

“If it wasn’t her, then who else could it be?” Xie Xuan felt a chill run down her spine as she thought of Lady Yue’s smiling, kind face.

In her past life, Xie Dan had become dull-witted, Xie Ze had died unexpectedly, and the position of Duke of Hengguo had ultimately fallen to Xie Hong of the second branch. Was that just a coincidence? Moreover, from what she had overheard in the Jingning Marquisate in her past life, it seemed that Lady Yue had played a role in Lady Luo’s affair with Xie Zhen back then.

Xie Xuan didn’t even dare to think too deeply about it—

Although Xie Hong was from the second branch, he was the eldest son in the family. Could Lady Yue have developed ambitions because of this? Back then, when Xie Zhen’s affair with Lady Luo had driven Tao Shi to divorce him, it had not only ruined the relationship between the Xie and Tao families but had also made the Duke of Hengguo’s residence a laughingstock. If Tao Shi had been so angry that something had gone wrong and she hadn’t given birth to the children, what then? If the old master had been even angrier and more ruthless back then, could he have petitioned to strip Xie Zhen of his position as heir and instead make Xie Yu, the second son, the heir?

Just adding a bit of speculation to the events of the past made Xie Xuan feel a chill.

That Lady Yue, who always smiled at everyone, kind and approachable, even sympathizing with the hardships of the servants, had a reputation for being virtuous in the residence. Xie Jun and Xie Xuan had been cared for by her when they were young, especially Xie Jun. During the period right after Tao Shi left, it was Lady Yue’s care that had helped Xie Jun get through it. In Xie Jun’s heart, she must have felt very close to Lady Yue, right?

Human emotions were too complex. Even among siblings connected by blood, it was hard to fully understand another person’s thoughts.

Xie Xuan closed her eyes, feeling exhausted. “Father will naturally investigate this matter. Let’s not talk about it for now. Sister, don’t you want to know how she’s doing?”

“I don’t.” Xie Jun coldly cut her off, her expression a mix of anger and concern as she looked at Xie Xuan. She sat down by the bed, avoiding all unpleasant topics, and said, “You’ve been through a lot in the past day and night. Rest for a while. I’ll stay here with you.”

Xie Xuan then burrowed under the covers and reached out to hold Xie Jun’s hand. “Sister, why don’t you come up too? There are books here to pass the time.”

“Alright.” Xie Jun didn’t call for the maids to help. She took off her shoes and socks herself and lay down beside Xie Xuan. She didn’t pick up a book to read but instead closed her eyes to rest, though her expression kept changing, as if she was slowly processing everything that had happened.

After a long while, just as Xie Xuan was starting to feel drowsy, she suddenly noticed that Xie Jun’s fingers were gradually curling up, as if she were clenching her fists to hold back her emotions. Surprised, Xie Xuan opened her eyes and looked up to see tears gathering under Xie Jun’s tightly closed eyelashes. Gradually, the tears accumulated and rolled down her cheeks.

“Sister?” Xie Xuan squeezed her hand.

Xie Jun didn’t open her eyes. Her slightly hoarse voice was suppressed. “You don’t know how much I hate her, Xuanxuan. You’ll never understand how painful it is to watch your own mother abandon you. I hate her. No matter what her reasons were, I hate her. I’ll always hate her!”

The suppressed resentment spilled out between her teeth, accompanied by tears that fell beside Xie Xuan’s ear.

Xie Xuan sighed, turned over, and held Xie Jun’s hand in her palms. “I understand, Sister.”

—Back then, Xie Xuan had just been a baby in swaddling clothes, with no feelings toward Tao Shi. So even when she later learned about her background, she might have resented Tao Shi, but it wasn’t deeply ingrained or intense. But Xie Jun was different. Before the age of five, she had been the cherished daughter of the Duke’s residence, raised in Tao Shi’s care. How much she had loved and depended on Tao Shi, only Xie Jun herself knew. And so, when Tao Shi had heartlessly left, Xie Jun, who was already beginning to understand things, had come to hate her.

When you deeply love someone and that love is betrayed, when warmth turns to coldness, love can turn into hatred.

Just like the resentment and hatred she had felt toward Han Jie when she was dying.

Moreover, Xie Jun had watched her mother abandon her with her own eyes.

Xie Xuan’s heart gradually twisted into a knot, filled with guilt. “I didn’t think it through properly. Sister, don’t be sad.”

“It’s fine.” Xie Jun opened her eyes. Though there were still tears and a misty look in her eyes, she forced a smile. “I’m fifteen now. These past ten years, haven’t I grown up just fine? Go to sleep. When Father comes back, there will still be things to do.”

When Xie Xuan woke up again, it was already dark. Fangzhou and the others, afraid of disturbing her sleep, hadn’t dared to light the lamps. The room was pitch black, without a sound.

She reached out to feel the space beside her, but it was empty. Clearly, Xie Jun had already left.

Xie Xuan sat up and called out, “Fangzhou?”

“Miss, you’re awake? Muye, light the lamps.” Fangzhou’s voice came from beside the bed. Xie Xuan, relying on the faint moonlight filtering into the room, saw Fangzhou sitting cross-legged by the chest at the foot of the bed, now scrambling to her feet.

Outside, Muye came in with a candle and lit the dozen or so lamps on the candlestick, gradually illuminating the room.

Xie Xuan let Fangzhou help her put on her clothes and shoes, then asked, “Where’s Sister?”

“Master came back at dusk and took the eldest miss out. I heard they went to see the old master. They haven’t returned yet.” Fangzhou handed Xie Xuan the water that Shilan had brought, helped her rinse her mouth, and then said, “Master ordered us not to disturb you. He said that when you woke up, you should stay in your room for now. He’ll handle everything.”

Hearing this, Xie Xuan didn’t press further. She brewed a pot of tea and sat under the pear tree in the central courtyard.

It was nearly midnight when Xie Zhen returned with Xie Jun. Seeing Xie Xuan still waiting in the courtyard, he brought the two sisters into the room.

Xie Zhen’s face was pale, and he seemed unsettled. After dismissing the maids, he had the sisters sit on stools and sighed. “Today’s events were my negligence. The old master has invoked the family rules. It’s too late to deal with it tonight, but tomorrow we’ll clear out the courtyard in the north corner and confine her there for a few months.”

“What family rules?” Xie Xuan was curious.

“It’s forty strokes with a paddle, carried out by the maids. For the mistress of the house, it’s a very severe punishment.” Xie Jun, holding her sister’s hand, seemed to empathize with Xie Zhen. She stood up and said, “Father, if you’re tired, why don’t you go rest first? I’ll stay with Xuanxuan tonight and tell her what happened.”

Xie Zhen sighed wearily, nodded, and looked at Xie Xuan as if he wanted to say something but ultimately left.

The two sisters then called the maids to help them wash up. When they lay down together on the bed, Xie Xuan, having just woken up, was full of energy, while Xie Jun, with many things on her mind, wasn’t sleepy. They leaned against the pillows and chatted.

Xie Jun recounted in detail how the old master had punished Lady Luo that night and sighed. “I never thought she could be so malicious. If Han Yujie hadn’t happened to be there, I really can’t imagine what would have happened. Father was also scolded by the old master today, with all the old accounts being settled. He must be feeling terrible. He also promised the old master that from now on, he’ll pay more attention to you and Dan and not let Lady Luo run wild.”

“Did Lady Luo say who informed her?”

“She said it was a maid, one she had sent to follow us.” Xie Jun, having exerted herself at the old master’s place, wasn’t in the mood to continue the earlier argument with Xie Xuan. She glossed over it lightly and added, “I really never thought Lady Luo could be so vicious. Even if you went to Xuanyuan Temple, how could she… how could she try to kill you!”

Xie Xuan was also puzzled. “Didn’t she say?”

“No, the old master didn’t press her in front of me. I don’t know if he’ll investigate later. For now, Lady Luo will be confined to the north courtyard to reflect for a few months.” Xie Jun, still shaken, pulled her sister into her arms. “When you mentioned it earlier, it was brief, and I was just startled. But after hearing Han Yujie describe the scene, the more I think about it, the more terrifying it becomes. If he hadn’t happened to pass by, I really don’t know…”

“Brother Yujie? Was he here earlier?”

Xie Jun nodded. “He really cares about you. He stayed until nightfall, only leaving after everything was explained. I think he hasn’t slept since yesterday until tonight, but he forced himself to stay awake. Xuanxuan, he really treats you well.”

Xie Xuan bit her lip and nodded slightly.

He had treated her well when they were together. In her past life, when she was alone in the temple, it was Han Jie who often visited her. After they married, the few days they spent together were indeed good. He was considerate and tender, often doing little things to amuse her. In their intimate moments, she had been deeply entangled, unable to extricate herself.

But that had only been fleeting moments of happiness, like fireworks in the sky—brilliant and dazzling when they burst, but followed by longer, deeper silence. She had been married to him for four years, over a thousand days and nights, but the time they had spent together added up to less than two months. When he was far away at the border, she had been left alone to endure Lady Han’s deliberate provocations, spending many lonely days and nights by herself.

The longing and torment, the hope and disappointment—Xie Xuan didn’t have the courage to endure it a second time.

His heart was set on serving the nation, so he should soar in his own sky. As for her, she just wanted to find someone who could be by her side day and night, to walk through every spring and summer together, to face every hardship together.

Her mood suddenly sank. Xie Xuan leaned on Xie Jun’s shoulder. “It’s late. Let’s sleep.”

After Lady Luo was confined, Xie Yue cried and made a fuss several times, but it had no effect. Instead, she was scolded by Xie Zhen, who ordered the maids to keep a close eye on her and make her study and write. Unable to achieve anything by making a scene, Xie Yue quieted down.

Xie Xuan had been biding her time, waiting for the right moment to try to get information out of Lady Luo and make Xie Jun see Lady Yue’s true colors. Before she could find the opportunity, however, Xie Zhen came to her.

Unexpectedly, he had come to ask his daughter about Tao Shi.